Snap to attention...

I'm sitting here wondering why I took the next two days off...

Its not going to help anything.

I'll prob spend the days drunk.

Fucking depressed man.

When I was younger I used to watch the Ironman competition on ESPN.

I would sit and watch it and be in total awe of these spectacular athletes.
They were fine tuned machines.
Fast. Efficient. The pinnacle of the human threshold of ultimate performance.

So, what am I getting at...

I bought a new bicycle. Its pretty cool.

I've wanted to train for a triathlon now for quite some time and I finally just said screw it... Threw down on a bike.

I've had it for a few days and only got to ride a few minutes thus far cause of work and scheduled drinking sessions. Riding bicycles isn't quite the same since I last had my big mountain big when I was 15. The new bike is all teched out and crazy light. The seat is god awful though. I have to wear padded bike shorts to manage the taint pain.

I've already crashed on it too. I crashed within the first.... 500 feet. Damn clipless pedals.

I guess the only reason I'm posting this is to hype myself up.

Buying this bike reminds me of how much I hate trying new things sometimes. I guess I can't stand not doing something perfect the first time out. Maybe its ego... maybe its being a perfectionist... maybe its just my OCD.

Ehhh.... fuck it.

Im gonna go ride my bike.

I realized a few nights back how desensitized I have become.

Its 0100HRS... monday morning...05.05.08. I am sitting at 7-11 on maryland parkway and karen getting a xzyience energy drink and some hot peanuts. I'm bullshitting with my partner gabbing about how much we dont like the people we work with... gabbing about what employee dining room we would be burning that night... honestly, I'm not really sure what we were talking about; just something unimportant.

We collectively decide to go drive to some nearby alleys, get out of the car, and creep around on foot looking for crackheads and other undesirables lurking in the night.

As we are leaving the parking lot a tone alert sounds on the radio. Lady with a gun just cracked off a round at her hubby; he runs out of the house and calls the cops. She barricades inside.

Within 10 seconds I'm rolling code on maryland parkway... I get up to 75 by vegas valley, 90 by desert inn... I'm within 1 or 2 car lengths of my buddy who got out of the parking lot before me cause I was trying to put my seatbelt on (I gave up after I tugged it once and it locked).

As I pass desert inn I start sipping on my energy drink... i can remember thinking about how tasty the "pink lemon" flavor is. I'm trying to load up the call on my computer with my other free hand to see if there are any updates... I realize that I'm getting closer to the apartments and I'm annoyed that I won't be able to finish my drink by the time I get there. I start thinking about if I going to pull out my shotgun or my assault rifle... I pull into the apartment complex, chug all the pink lemon I can handle, toss the can out of the window and grab my trusty bitch (watch training day "i'm surgical wit dis bitch").

My partner pulls the "victim" behind some cover and talks to the guy. I rack a buckshot into the tube. The sound of a shotgun racking always makes me crack a smile; reminds me of that little happy rush of joy when I was 5-6 years old and I found out that my mom made tacos for dinner. I take cover behind the hood of a car; I yell for a spot light on the door. I hear my buddy call to her over the PA.

She comes out... no gun in hand...

"Put your fucking hands in the air!".... I try to remember where my chapstick is, damn dry lips.

My partner grabs her and puts her in cuffs as I sprint inside the house. I stalk through the unfamiliar dwelling and notice the hint of gunpowder in the air. Room to room; no one else inside. We find the gun... the spent shell casing... meth pipes...

Turns out both people need to go to jail... My partner and I joke about how there are never any true victims anymore...

On my way to jail I realize that I never got the epinephrine shakes... I never got the hand trembles... I didn't get the labored breathing... I catch myself cracking another smile. I catch myself being annoyed that she didn't come out of the house with that gun in her hand.

As we sit at jail and do paperwork my partner jokes and says "Bro, I though we were gonna walk in there and her head was gonna be a fucking canoe". I start laughing and tell him "I'm surprised I didn't half to gauge the bitch." We both chuckle a bit and focus back on the work at hand... I start thinking about what I would have done with my time off if she did come out with the gun. I'm pretty sure he was thinking the same.

As the rolling doors of the jail ascend and all the paper work is done... I see 5:12 on the clock of my dash. I send the dispatcher a message letting her know that me and my partner were going to eat at 0600 instead of 0500 like we originally planned...

As I pull up to the intersection of Sahara and Paradise I hear another tone alert on the radio. I turn down my music and stop singing. A female just got stabbed on Sierra Vista. I think of the freshly murdered hispanic man that I found a few weeks before. I think of the bloodbath... the supervisors swirling around trying to supervise a bunch of people who know how to do their job... I think of the Homicide detective sergeant who showed up on scene with a chewed stub of a cigar hanging out of his mouth. I can remember him making a comment about how nice a day it was going to be as he walked into the crimson stained and splattered apartment.

*fuck*brain*wandering*

I sit up straight in the driver's seat, switch on my lights and siren and realize that this is the 5th time I've rolled code for the night.

It's 02/29/08... leap year... sweet!

I've always liked leap years. When I was a little kid I always thought of Feb 29th as a bonus day to do whatever you wanted to do with it. I liked to think that no matter what you did, it didn't matter because it was a FREE day. Like a free spin on Wheel of Fortune or The Price is Right...

So today is my "free day"... whats great is I'm actually off.... kinda... ?? Work starts at 2200hrs... thats 10:00PM for all of you not in the know.

Which brings me to the actual update...

53 weeks later:
-Graduated academy
-Graduated field training
-Got rid of the Audi for a.... VW Rabbit (but... see below)
-Bought a house

There is more too obviously but today is not the time to throw up the goings on of the last year of my life... after all, today is Feb 29th... my bonus day...

Stay tuned for all the weird crap that I encounter...

Today was weird...
Tomorrow will be god awful...

First today:

Day starts off and I just exhausted. My sleep anymore has been piss poor. I have alot on my mind I guess. So I wake up and I scratch my balls and try to figure out what the hell I'm gonna do today. Well, I decide that going to Office Depot would be a good thing to do. I go, get some shit, and leave. As I am driving down the road, I get the urge to hit up Subskates... NEW KICKS bitches...

So 1330hrs rolls around and its coffee time. Coffee time was most outstanding. MOST OUTSTANDING.

Then, I made a double layer cake

So tomorrow:

Tomorrow is OC day/Midterm test day. This is the second time I will be sprayed with OC by metro. For those who have not been sprayed with pepper spray... OH MY GOD. The stuff we use is as bad as bear repellent. You are usually fucked up for at least 3 hours after being sprayed.

It's a right of passage though... only 9 weeks left til I'm done.

Today has been a weird day...

Makes you optimistic and yet strangely lost. You want tomorrow to hurry up and get here but you are scared that once its here everything you want out of it won't happen or that you just misread the previous day.

fucking balls...

Anticipation is god awful...

"What lies behind us, and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us." ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

soooooooo....

its been a bit since i updated. oh well :)

well... I'm more than halfway done with academy.

I've done all my gun stuff already.
- 1. I'm actually pretty decent with my handgun.
- 2. I'm an efficent killing machine with a shotgun.

I've done all my driving stuff.
- 1. I got to drive on a racetrack with a black and white at speeds Ford prob never intended the Crown Vic to reach.
- 2. God help the poor idiot that trys to run from me... HA!

I'll continue this later... I'm completely hammered and my cat won't leave me the hell alone! AHHHHH!

"At my signal... unleash hell!" - Russell Crowe

***WARNING***
I am extremely angry and bitter right now... you have been forewarned!
***WARNING**

well... I'll update really quick.

We are done with week 7 and are now fast approaching the second day of week 8.

Week 7, "Range week", turned out to be more of a pain in the ass than I thought it would. I figured that we all would be throwin out hot lead like Alonzo (Denzel Washington) in Training day... Boy was I fucking mistaken!
I'd say I shot more than 5,000 rounds in my five days and just ended up with a huge headache, a VERY dirty gun, a few small holes in my Matix hoodie, and bruises all over my legs from shooting from my knees and from shooting prone.

I qualed though... I missed qualing expert by 0.4% though... more fucking bullshit...

SOOOOOO....

I was completely stupid to think that my short vacation from insanity would actually make me happy/feel good. I broke a tooth and now need a root canal... My entire break was spent taking long boring naps and popping motrin 800's.

I just wanna fucking scream man... Its been a rough week and a half.

I gotta try to go to sleep now. I need to be up and at "work" an hour earlier so I can be bored to death.

"I hate people. People make me pro-nuclear." - Margaret Smith

well shit... what can i say...

its been an interesting past few weeks. here are the updates:

I am officially done with week 6. These past 6 weeks have been some of the most interesting weeks of my life.

The academy itself is pretty crazy. It's a magical place where nothing but your best is acceptable but nothing is ever good enough... Its almost comical. I walk into the building scanning the halls for staff; always ready to snap to attention and hoping that I will do it fast enough so I don't start the day off with a brisk set of push-ups.

Assuming I make it unscathed to the locker room, I dress out with a bunch of people that if it wasn't for all of us being in the same boat, they would never talk to me. Most of them make fun of the way I dress or the way I act. Its all good though... afterall, I AM the youngest guy in the academy. So, I dress out and dodge the typical "why do you have pink shoes?" or "why do your gloves have pink lips on them?" or the even better yet "damn dude, you are such a fag".

Then comes inspection. I think its a subconscious reaction; the more people yell, the less I actually think about what they are asking me. Most of the time I sit there with a random song flowin' through my head.

Then the classessssssssss... ooops. I fell asleep thinking about them.

P.T. sessions; are for lack of a better description... "an exercise in futility" A huge group of yellow shirt wearing, out of shape recruits yelling chants attemping to not kill each other on a run filled with turn-arounds and uphill routes around every turn.
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Overall I am hanging in there. On the really difficult days I think of that absurd bill that lands in my mailbox around the 12th of the month... Thanks audi... I love the ulcer you have given me.

As far as academics, I doing pretty good. Could probably be doing better but I am still trying to find a nice balance of staying sane and retaining all the info that I need.

On my practicals, I am doing really well. Alot of people stress out about the practical tests; actually going out and doing cool cop shit and getting graded on it. I personally really like them. I feel like I am in my element. It gives you a chance to relax and talk to people and get your own thing flowin'. Keeps me hopeful that when all this training is over, I'll be a bonafide, grade A, USDA prime crime fighter... yeah...
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Also now, I just got my own place... Its pretty crazy to know that as of Jan 12th, 2007 I will be stepping out on my own. Its exciting and scary all at the same time. I'm lucky though, I have a great girl standing behind me that will be there with me.

Plus... My furniture is the shit... I don't have my 42" HD LCD TV yet but I got a Wii... So that makes me the shit.

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Well, I hate to kinda just end it all abrupt-like but I have a nice long day tomorrow. Tomorrow is range. I am gonna be throwin' out hot lead like the true gangster I am. Only problem with shooting at the range is they don't let me hold my gun sideways :)

Here are the stats:

Progress : 25% complete
Miles run: Approx 54mi
Weight lost: 11lbs
Mental meltdowns : ZERO :)

This is the start of something.... well... just something.

Tomorrow will be the first day of one of the most important things I ever do...

I am a mere 8 hours away from my first day of police academy.

I feel like I am either going to puke everywhere or have a heart attack and fall over dead.

It's 2212HRS (I will be using only 24 hour time from here on out) and I have to report at 0530 tomorrow morning.

1. My boots look like shit...
2. I don't have a lunch made...
3. My car isn't packed...
4. I still have a few pieces of paper which I need to fill out...
5. I feel like I'm going to forget my head in the morning...

I'm scared.
I'm excited.
I'm ready to start already.
I'm ready to run away and hide.

This is the first of many entries I plan on making. I have had many live journals in the past but there were usually rants about girls and how life sucked...

This will be no different as far as content; same old pissing and moaning. Only difference now is there will hopefully be FAR LESS pissing and moaning about girls and more pissing and moaning about the agony which I am about to subject myself to.

Oh well... the almighty dollar will push me to my breaking point and probably make me find guts that I didn't realize I had. Here's hoping at least...

*cheers* to me...

"All glory comes from daring to begin.--Eugene F. Ware"